Advice For Dating Men
Dating men can be a little tricky. What’s fun one moment can turn maddening the next. Dating men, as any woman who has been in the dating game for any length of time will tell you, is a lot tougher than dating women. I’ll give you some tips to avoid being burned and how to get your guy to fall in love with you.
Dating men is tough. You could go months without a man, and still never find a good one. Dating men is even harder. Take it from someone who has been in the game for years, and am a lesbian, meaning don’t have the option to only date women, but walk right into the burning, raging pool of dating. It’s an embarrassing situation, yes, but I’m an expert at ignoring red flags.
The first thing to avoid is being too eager to establish physical relationships with men in order to move on to the next step. It might work on some men, but chances are good you won’t find “the one” this way. If you want to be successful dating men, take your time with the first relationship, build up trust and emotional labour. When you do meet that man, let him take the lead and develop the relationship from there. It’s a lot less painful if you establish emotional labour first.
The second thing you should keep out of your dating funnel is using popular social media sites to attract men. There is a big difference between being a “good” girlfriend/wife and being an attractive” girlfriend/wife” on Instagram, MySpace or Facebook. It’s OK to have an account and put pictures of yourself, but don’t overdo it. Remember that most of these sites have millions of members so you can’t really target anyone in particular – it would be like trying to hunt down the member of an obscure country in Asia!
The third thing to remember when looking at a potential dating app is to look at what sort of people will be interested in it. If you are just entering this dating scene for the first time, consider whether you have any common interests. If not, consider whether it’s possible to find someone who does have those interests. For example, if you’re attracted to tall men, there are dating sites that cater for them – you might want to use such a site.
The fourth thing you should stay away from is joining a dating site purely based on the “looks”. If all you are looking for is a bit of visual stimulation, you’re not going to find a particularly great service. Dating men should involve building a relationship of mutual affection first and foremost. If all you have is the hope of meeting “that one” whose photograph you liked on Instagram, you’ll likely be disappointed.
Finally, remember that you don’t need to put on a show in order to attract a man. A lot of women think that dating men requires a great deal of “spark”, but this is completely false. What actually causes attraction is something known as “emotional labour” – whereby you spend a large amount of time building a relationship based upon strong emotional bonds. If you’re attracted to a guy because he makes you feel good, then that’s all you need.
There is definitely room in the dating world for gay and bisexual dating men. The key is to ensure that your profile doesn’t alienate anyone. Whilst you should use social media sites such as Instagram and Facebook to meet men, don’t let your emotional attachment to get in the way of your dating process. If you take this advice, you could end up with a date who matches up with your description quite well!